I have something I felt the Lord had called me to do, but I have faced tremendous doubts. I cannot do this in my flesh, I've prayed for four months now and requested many prayers about this. Please pray HIS will, not my will, is accomplished and He would send help. That I would obey through His Spirit alone. Thank you.
Helll everyone.. this is my beautiful testimony of how God changed my life !
I was raised in Christian home. My parents were both saved and they loved Jesus Christ so much! I loved their zeal as a child and they always taught us that God was the most important thing than anything in our lives.
Though I was brought in a loving home, there were times where my mother took me and my younger siblings around her family. She didn't know their intentions, but between the ages of 4-10 I was molested and raped by many of my cousins. This led to so many poor choices I made in my life.
I was addicted to all types of pornography, sex, I was very disrespectful to my parents, prideful and I hurt others in ways unimaginable.
I was a very hurt kid growing up.. but God always called me through my parents. My desire to live in the world was much bigger than living for Jesus. It wasn't until i made the biggest mistake in my life by giving my virginity willfully. After that I lived with a lot of shame and guilt depression.. God started to do something through me though. Between the years of 2017-2018 God took everything away from me in order for me to hear his voice. He told me that many things I've done was wrong and if I didn't repent I would make it into heaven. It was out of fear first that I repented.. but after finding about God the more I spent time with him I desired a relationship with him.. 2 months later he saved me and filled me with his spirit. Today I'm healed ! Because of what Jesus has done for me. He has changed me and made me into a new creature and for all who don't believe in Christ I can tell you that I'm a loving testimony that he is real. God bless
Sinners are the greatest of all fools, fools of their own making. I to was that fool, until I found out about Jesus Christ the King of KINGS and the lord of LORDS! We would do well to know this by never forget this Psalm. O LORD WRITE THIS ON MY HEART TODAY AND EVERY DAY. Count it all JOY! Bless the Name of Jesus all you SAINTS!
I feel so alone I have made mistakes allot in the pass but I'm just want family and better things but family won't stop judging me and I just want love.....
The Father of all existing and of all creation. I remember when people forgot about The True GOD that gave grace to humanity and worlds to come. I also remember
Those who neglected and rejected the
Lord for sinful lives for lustful flesh. I remember all those beings who mistakes GOD For Evil during the time
Of plague in the world because disobedience to GOD who gives life and life more abundantly. I remember the time when GOD saved me from all
My enemies by giving me the strength
To overcome the world. I know my reward be with me in heaven. Meaning
Salvation and Restoration of The Temple Of GOD AND HIS SON JESUS CHRIST.AMEN.
over 15 or more years ago I was going to Kings church in Humble, TX and a friend annointed me and the next time i went to church I spoke in tongues can u point me to scripture about it as I need to find a church where others speak in tongues so I dont feel out of place. A lot of churches dont speak in tongues. Most people look at me funny and think i am some kind of witch. I havent been religous much and have been locked in house since the covid thing, in 5 years since I've livedin Cedar Park, texas. I came down with staage 4 cancer and I am on chemo and have started searching out the bible thru different shows on utube, apostles and prophets. Thanks for listening.
I would appreciate your prayers for me, that the Lord would help me show to all meekness unto all men, like it says to do in Titus 3 - I struggle to do that, especially toward my mom, which is not honoring her, and it's sin.
I also battle with idolatry, especially the temptation to overindulge in video games - by God's grace, I've stayed away from video games for over a year and a half (praise God), but the temptation to play a "little" is there, which almost always has turned into overindulgence and idolatry - and the temptation seems to be growing more and more. I think if the Lord gave me clarity, to see things the way He wants me to, and to love the things He loves, and hate the things He hates, it would greatly help.
Prayers for healing.I believe that He is the great physician. The one and only God. I pray for a complete physical healing in Jesus name. Thank you for your prayers.
I've been saved by my Father in heaven on the terrible throws ofu drug addiction, I was sent an angel in the flesh and became a renowned Sober, Christian & devoted all of myself to help you other people battling addiction.
Does God look at us as being evil when we relapse or pick up that alcohol during out weakness see us from our heart n soul and allow us to be in heaven, or does he damn all Addict and alcoholic.ppl to hell?
Jesus died on a Wednesday which was passover as the lamb of God. 6p.m. began Fiest of unleaven bread( high Sabbath). Jesus was in the grave 3 nights and arose early Saturday morning. In the koine greek if you look the words up individually and the latin you find truth.
Marrying someone who had been divorced, married until their death but being baptized after the marriage was I living in adultures marriage all those years, & still. If so what should I do to follow the Bible teaching.
My sister murdered our parents. I turned to God for guidance on how not to go crazy, to not tread a dark path of vengeance, to seek forgiveness and grace during a terrible and challenging time....I pray she finds God, and I continue on my path.....and I thank God every day for the blessings he has bestowed upon me....James, Job, 2Timothy were especially helpful.
I am a paradox of sorts. I was born to a saintly mother and a troubled dad who drank to forget horrors of World War II. We were poverty stricken but we never did without. My bossy sister was 6-years older, my sweet brother was 6 years younger. My life was great until my maternal grandmother fell and broke her shoulder. Turns out she was a victim of breast cancer when I was only 6. My amazing grandpa died 9 months after she did with a broken heart.
How sad my life became! No more fancy homemade dresses from Granny. No more fairy tales from Grandpa. I became very shy. The older I got, the more shy I became until, I would turn red if someone even looked at me. My sister and I started attending the Nazarene Church with our neighbors. The only friend I had in Sunday school was a crippled girl who did not make me feel inferior. In fact I picked out all my friends by looking to see if they had a right to be shy too. (too fat, too skinny, too tall, too short) How Shallow!
By the time 2 other brothers had been born, I had decided that I wanted to help the unfortunate, the lame, the weak, the sickly. In fact I wanted to become a missionary nurse. I became a born-again Christian at about the age of 12.
As my friends at school began to fill out a little, I noticed I was the one who was tall and skinny. I became more shy than ever afraid I would never have a boyfriend, never marry . . .
After graduation from high school, I did become a registered nurse. I wanted to witness to folks on their deathbeds so they would not miss Heaven. However, my personality did a 360 degree turn. Now I thought I was pretty, just the right size, the favorite nurse of everyone, etc. I ran into some issues with some sinful boyfriends. Please dont act this way. I broke my sweet mama's heart for a while until I returned to Christ who amazingly forgave me and set me on the path toward righteousness.
When I was a little girl I thought I had a normal family at least it seemed that way to me. My dad was a minister , yet he was given to the demon of alcoholism. My mom worked like a dog to make ends meet. I had 3 other sisters that was older than me who quickly married so it pretty much left me alone . I grew up being to myself a lot. I got to know God because my father introduced him to us at a early age then I got to know him on my own as I became a young lady. Satan started the lie of telling me I wasn't good enough early on in life. I never felt comfortable around people so when I hung out with so called friends I started to drink just to feel like I could be comfortable in my own skin . Because when I drank I became someone else and not my quiet , awkward self. This went on for the first few years of my adult life. Then I started to date and the first real boyfriend I had was a monster from hell who cheated all the time and told me I would never be anything and made me feel like trash and not to mention the abuse I tried to hide from everyone ( I married this guy) So I spent many years in deep depression and isolated from life. I got a divorce and eventually married another guy pretty much just as bad as the first guy but God got me out of that relationship too.Then the devil put a spirit of rejection on my life that I had to fight through for many years. It was like every where I went no one seemed to like me no matter what. So I went further into depression. I spent a lot of time praying and fasting. I am 48 yrs old now and I just gotten to the place where I know who I am in Jesus and I feel good about my relationship with Christ. I don't drink and I have gotten rid of all those toxic friendships . I spend my time with my 2 daughters and the lord and I believe God for a kingdom marriage . God has been working in my life all along because through all that I went through he kept me safe and in my right mind.
Praise the Lord , God sent me a deliverer behind bars to fight off two murderers and two felons from killng me in my cell in 2018 , there was four men brutally beating people up in jail was coming in my cell at 6 am when the doors was locked at shut down the night before at 11 pm one of the murderers thought I had gotten the guards to do a shake down at 11 but I wasn't the one who told on them , for having a knife behind bars , rats get murdered so the murderers in cell 2 was coming the next morning when they pop the cell doors for breakfast and that's where we all go out to eat breakfast so at six am the door popped and I got bum rushed by some brutal felons but God sent a man praying in the power of the holy ghost right in behind them and ran them out of my cell he came in three weeks before the attach and became my friend his name was shawn , but in my heart I know just an average man could not pray like he did the feircness of his tounge he prayed in was incredible he was not a man ,I truly believe that he was an angel of the lord because no natural man could do what he had done for me so people if you don't believe in angels watching over us think again for my Lord and savior love me so much they he despatched and angel from heaven who called himself my armour barrar so blessed is our lord Jesus Christ who is all powerful and always ready to deliver us
I'd like to share some words of encouragement to those that have ears to hear .
I have been seeking God for many years , started from ground zero , Knowing nothing except that the scriptures (the bible) is the truth . God gave me that unshakable truth .
Now I read only the bible for a source of truth , after seeking help from other books , they only created confusion.
But God has always been open to my prayers when they are according to his will . All the selfish prayers get a NO or silence . He truly hears prayer and sees everything.
I have experienced that Jesus really will care for all my problems if I take them to him in prayer and trust Him with it .
He has never failed . Sometimes He changes me with his grace to endure the problem , or changes things miraculously .
Have faith in God and be at peace . Read the Bible . Amen
My testimony is to vast an most do not believe it Raised in church left at age 11 started using drugs an alcoholic life of crime led me to sicward at age 22 for a month hang my self in bathroom died went to hell God brought me back I have died a least 4times from age 6to22 doctors said to me when I left sicward my life would look like this not able to work drive, get Married or raise family God is good I work an drive Simi for a living married 33 years two children an 4 grand sons an on an on God has done to much to write it all down
The answers that I seek are either by prayer, or from Scripture...
However, I write to you for your opinion; so please read the following:
My wife and I have been married for 27 years. She is 55 years of age and stricken with Alzheimers Dementia and now resides in a Personal Care Home.
I believe that it was manifested by my sins and tempting God and Satan to do their worst to me.
We had a real love after finally finding each other through Gods intervention.
In recent years; our relationship was suffering for many reasons, no blame to either of us but to both of us. I could not suffer my wife to leave her and I could not bear her to suffer the rejection.
So, in my mind; I thought that it would be easier on me and my wife to lose her spouse by death rather than by rejection. So I tempted God and Satan to do your worst.
Then it came to pass that I got an infection in my brain and tried to ride it out to death, but reasoning with myself that this may not bring death but rather life with an infliction, So I finally went to the hospital and the surgeon performed a cranial and then three months of intravenous antibiotics.
I did not fulfill the curse that I wished for.
Shortly thereafter, my wife was stricken with Alzheimers Dementia.
Now the ambiguous loss and the guilt that I feel because of my continued tempting of God and Satan to do your worst to me.
Well now; it has come to pass the worst curse, only my wife has become a victim of my sins.
I had recently become born again so that I could repent my sins and pray for my wife and ask God to perform a miracle and remove the demons from my wife and make whole again.
In conclusion;
I had a dream and a clear voice said to me "This is you cross to bear"
When I looked to the internet to find a meaning for this phrase, the first example displayed was;
"when a family member is diagnosed with Alzheimers, this is your cross to bear."
I want to thank God for being in my life God have been so good to me and my family i feel myself growing stronger and stronger in the lord he is my refuge and i put all my trust in God ,he have brought me from a mighty long way last year i was going through anxiety and stress i took all my burdens and gave them to the lord i can do all things through christ jesus i ask you to pray for my home shield it with the blood of jesus
LORD I come to YOU humbly in the name of YESHUA that I hear other good words an things happening to an for my son Joshua who needs inner an mental illness healings. LORD only YOU will make the way for me to have a home an lands to receive him when he us released back to us. Reconciling him back to me an his sisters an his brothers out of a godly circled situation into our godly situation for him an us. I pray to be moved to Richmond Virginia an buying. 5 bedroom to 7 bedroom 5 to 7 baths homes new an renovated an living debt free in ministry there an to start the ministry there that the LORD wants us to. I pray to be in real estate an get a computer now for my work now an not have to pay extra money for internet. I need my drivers license an a new SUV Mercedes blue an coach like in baby shiny blue an blue interior. All the farm equipment we need an riding lawn mowers an feed for animals. My art studio an home altar prayer room in our homes. Flower gardens an lighting an seats an gazebos on right place, homes on basement right slope lots. I pray that all of 6 children an their devine spouses to be divine destiny partners in this ministry. And they all speak for the LORD.I pray I marry that right man in Richmond Virginia an he is in ministry with us an owning us as though we started day 1 with us a family an receive my grands an my god child an we his. LORD O do want to farm there also vegetables an chickens. My son wants horses an cows too that we will take care of ourselves an our neighbors. Thank YOU LORD for a river that is clean an has clean edible fish even salt water an fresh water streams. I thank GOD for our debt free large brick an stone homes. An our church built of the same an debt free with a 5 bedroom home on the side for visiting ministers an prayer time an fasting an shut in unto the LORD. LORD I THANK for causing all of my grands an great grands be saved early an live GOD an my children the rest of their eternity an me an my Devine new spouse. Amen
Hi everyone! The Lord has help my husband and I in so many ways, it is amazing! After we got married many things came into play. First miracle is when we were going to sell our house and move to another state for retirement. For 2 years every weekend we went to look at houses. At last our agent showed us house that I did not want to move in. We put out our fliers to sell our old house. We were amazed that we sold it in one month. We have never seen a house go so fast. Now we needed a place to move to. My husband wanted us to look at the property I was not into. Before you know it we got it in (are you ready for this) 1 month.
As time went on, we now know why God wanted us to have this house. We moved to a small town and between 2 good sized small cities. We started doing ministry to the local senior center. There was our church denomination in those 2 small cities. 18 miles in both direction. We truly believe that God did have a hand in all this. May God give you the love and grace that he has bless us with.
I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and savior @ 3:16 am today to come into my heart and life to rule and Lord over my life till the day I draw my last breath...
I am so grateful for the Lord Jesus helping me overcome my temptations and worries he has given me strength and hope that I thought i would never obtain. I was quite a shy and sensitive person still am but with the Lords help I have obtained the courage to be bold and be a street preacher in LONDON!!! I am so glad that I was shown the glory of the gospel as it has changed my life for the better I used to be a very angry sad bitter person who hated others for being different but with the lord's wisdom and correcting I have become A more loving and caring person. This was not my own doing but the Lord gave me a new heart and I'm very glad that I have it. I am trying my best to be the best Christian i can be and be a good follower of CHRIST JESUS. I still have things I need to work on and improve as I am a simple man but with god helping me anything is possible if god can help a wretch like me he can save Anyone! I know that the dream that I have to meet a godly woman will happen because I put my faith in Lord Jesus. Stay strong in the faith brothers and sisters thank you for reading. Praise Lord Jesus!!!!!
I was blind, then with some preaching and reading of the Word, I saw men walking as trees, then I repented in faith, now I can see and dwell in the peace of Jesus Christ by His Holy Spirit.
I grew up believing in God, but my faith wasn't tested until I lived on my own. Boy was I ever tested. I had to reconsider everything I believed from ground up and questioned everything. I was quite lost. It's quite a vulnerable and insecure position to be in. Life was overwhelming, eating my lunch, and I had lots of self doubt.
Fortunately, some new influences came into my life and slowly, question by question I had began being answered. I began filling the holes in my faith and I began feeling more hopeful about life. I'm grateful for everyone who followed God's nudging to come walk with me and offer support, even if for a short time. I believe God can use people to be blessings in other people's lives. And I was a recipient of that. I seek to pay it forward. I'm imperfect and still hit bumps in the road, but try my best to follow Jesus, love God and love my neighbor.
I also realized life isn't about me being happy. God doesn't exist for that. He's not a genie in a bottle there to serve me. I'm not entitled to anything, despite what this culture brainwashes people into believing. However, when I shift my focus onto loving God and loving others and deciding to be content, I naturally become far happier and satisfied with my life. Interesting how that works.
Hi my name is Steve Ippolito and I live in las Vegas, my story is one in itself based on my experiences. I was 24 years old married for over 5years and was working for the NASA program threw a contractor for the Govt to make rocket engines , the company's name was Rockwell international. My marriage was on the brink of divorce and I needed help, the problem was that both my wife and me were going to two different churches and with having much problems in our marriage none of the pastors could help with our issues because of not having the true love for us as a couple struggling with our indifferences as we sought out wisdom and guidance for our marriage.
I was doing great at the job but my wife just couldn't find her way in the work field and was slipping away from being a wife/friend/sister, in the lord due to her not being able to fit in somewhere doing some kind of work, although she didn't have to go to work since the lord had blessed me with a good annual income to provide for the both of us,but she needed something to keep her busy and just couldn't find anything. I started to notice changes with her and odd behavior's happening , so as time continued to pass I just kept praying the lord will help her and guide her, but she just couldn't pull it together . Her friends were not Christians and she was falling back into drugs and drinking. I didn't know how to handle it and the churches we were attaining didn't care enough to help.
It was on a Sunday early evening when I got the call from my mother in law saying to me that Debbie had died, this is when the real story of my life begins, since that day I began to fall myself back into old habits and began to pursue DEATH to be with my Debbie. I did what I could do , to get to the grave and so I make a long story short because there are so so many words to add to the story here and to explain all of my experiences, all I can say at this juncture is if my story can be worth telling on your web-site...
I was raised in Christian home. My parents were both saved and they loved Jesus Christ so much! I loved their zeal as a child and they always taught us that God was the most important thing than anything in our lives.
Though I was brought in a loving home, there were times where my mother took me and my younger siblings around her family. She didn't know their intentions, but between the ages of 4-10 I was molested and raped by many of my cousins. This led to so many poor choices I made in my life.
I was addicted to all types of pornography, sex, I was very disrespectful to my parents, prideful and I hurt others in ways unimaginable.
I was a very hurt kid growing up.. but God always called me through my parents. My desire to live in the world was much bigger than living for Jesus. It wasn't until i made the biggest mistake in my life by giving my virginity willfully. After that I lived with a lot of shame and guilt depression.. God started to do something through me though. Between the years of 2017-2018 God took everything away from me in order for me to hear his voice. He told me that many things I've done was wrong and if I didn't repent I would make it into heaven. It was out of fear first that I repented.. but after finding about God the more I spent time with him I desired a relationship with him.. 2 months later he saved me and filled me with his spirit. Today I'm healed ! Because of what Jesus has done for me. He has changed me and made me into a new creature and for all who don't believe in Christ I can tell you that I'm a loving testimony that he is real. God bless
"Blessed are they that keep his testimonies, and that seek him with the whole heart."
The Father of all existing and of all creation. I remember when people forgot about The True GOD that gave grace to humanity and worlds to come. I also remember
Those who neglected and rejected the
Lord for sinful lives for lustful flesh. I remember all those beings who mistakes GOD For Evil during the time
Of plague in the world because disobedience to GOD who gives life and life more abundantly. I remember the time when GOD saved me from all
My enemies by giving me the strength
To overcome the world. I know my reward be with me in heaven. Meaning
Salvation and Restoration of The Temple Of GOD AND HIS SON JESUS CHRIST.AMEN.
For the Book of Life will show your whole life. I had a after death. I saw the Book.
I also battle with idolatry, especially the temptation to overindulge in video games - by God's grace, I've stayed away from video games for over a year and a half (praise God), but the temptation to play a "little" is there, which almost always has turned into overindulgence and idolatry - and the temptation seems to be growing more and more. I think if the Lord gave me clarity, to see things the way He wants me to, and to love the things He loves, and hate the things He hates, it would greatly help.
Does God look at us as being evil when we relapse or pick up that alcohol during out weakness see us from our heart n soul and allow us to be in heaven, or does he damn all Addict and alcoholic.ppl to hell?
How sad my life became! No more fancy homemade dresses from Granny. No more fairy tales from Grandpa. I became very shy. The older I got, the more shy I became until, I would turn red if someone even looked at me. My sister and I started attending the Nazarene Church with our neighbors. The only friend I had in Sunday school was a crippled girl who did not make me feel inferior. In fact I picked out all my friends by looking to see if they had a right to be shy too. (too fat, too skinny, too tall, too short) How Shallow!
By the time 2 other brothers had been born, I had decided that I wanted to help the unfortunate, the lame, the weak, the sickly. In fact I wanted to become a missionary nurse. I became a born-again Christian at about the age of 12.
As my friends at school began to fill out a little, I noticed I was the one who was tall and skinny. I became more shy than ever afraid I would never have a boyfriend, never marry . . .
After graduation from high school, I did become a registered nurse. I wanted to witness to folks on their deathbeds so they would not miss Heaven. However, my personality did a 360 degree turn. Now I thought I was pretty, just the right size, the favorite nurse of everyone, etc. I ran into some issues with some sinful boyfriends. Please dont act this way. I broke my sweet mama's heart for a while until I returned to Christ who amazingly forgave me and set me on the path toward righteousness.
When I was a little girl I thought I had a normal family at least it seemed that way to me. My dad was a minister , yet he was given to the demon of alcoholism. My mom worked like a dog to make ends meet. I had 3 other sisters that was older than me who quickly married so it pretty much left me alone . I grew up being to myself a lot. I got to know God because my father introduced him to us at a early age then I got to know him on my own as I became a young lady. Satan started the lie of telling me I wasn't good enough early on in life. I never felt comfortable around people so when I hung out with so called friends I started to drink just to feel like I could be comfortable in my own skin . Because when I drank I became someone else and not my quiet , awkward self. This went on for the first few years of my adult life. Then I started to date and the first real boyfriend I had was a monster from hell who cheated all the time and told me I would never be anything and made me feel like trash and not to mention the abuse I tried to hide from everyone ( I married this guy) So I spent many years in deep depression and isolated from life. I got a divorce and eventually married another guy pretty much just as bad as the first guy but God got me out of that relationship too.Then the devil put a spirit of rejection on my life that I had to fight through for many years. It was like every where I went no one seemed to like me no matter what. So I went further into depression. I spent a lot of time praying and fasting. I am 48 yrs old now and I just gotten to the place where I know who I am in Jesus and I feel good about my relationship with Christ. I don't drink and I have gotten rid of all those toxic friendships . I spend my time with my 2 daughters and the lord and I believe God for a kingdom marriage . God has been working in my life all along because through all that I went through he kept me safe and in my right mind.
I have been seeking God for many years , started from ground zero , Knowing nothing except that the scriptures (the bible) is the truth . God gave me that unshakable truth .
Now I read only the bible for a source of truth , after seeking help from other books , they only created confusion.
But God has always been open to my prayers when they are according to his will . All the selfish prayers get a NO or silence . He truly hears prayer and sees everything.
I have experienced that Jesus really will care for all my problems if I take them to him in prayer and trust Him with it .
He has never failed . Sometimes He changes me with his grace to endure the problem , or changes things miraculously .
Have faith in God and be at peace . Read the Bible . Amen
The answers that I seek are either by prayer, or from Scripture...
However, I write to you for your opinion; so please read the following:
My wife and I have been married for 27 years. She is 55 years of age and stricken with Alzheimers Dementia and now resides in a Personal Care Home.
I believe that it was manifested by my sins and tempting God and Satan to do their worst to me.
We had a real love after finally finding each other through Gods intervention.
In recent years; our relationship was suffering for many reasons, no blame to either of us but to both of us. I could not suffer my wife to leave her and I could not bear her to suffer the rejection.
So, in my mind; I thought that it would be easier on me and my wife to lose her spouse by death rather than by rejection. So I tempted God and Satan to do your worst.
Then it came to pass that I got an infection in my brain and tried to ride it out to death, but reasoning with myself that this may not bring death but rather life with an infliction, So I finally went to the hospital and the surgeon performed a cranial and then three months of intravenous antibiotics.
I did not fulfill the curse that I wished for.
Shortly thereafter, my wife was stricken with Alzheimers Dementia.
Now the ambiguous loss and the guilt that I feel because of my continued tempting of God and Satan to do your worst to me.
Well now; it has come to pass the worst curse, only my wife has become a victim of my sins.
I had recently become born again so that I could repent my sins and pray for my wife and ask God to perform a miracle and remove the demons from my wife and make whole again.
In conclusion;
I had a dream and a clear voice said to me "This is you cross to bear"
When I looked to the internet to find a meaning for this phrase, the first example displayed was;
"when a family member is diagnosed with Alzheimers, this is your cross to bear."
Are my prayers lost?
As time went on, we now know why God wanted us to have this house. We moved to a small town and between 2 good sized small cities. We started doing ministry to the local senior center. There was our church denomination in those 2 small cities. 18 miles in both direction. We truly believe that God did have a hand in all this. May God give you the love and grace that he has bless us with.
Around 30 years ago.
:)
I would drown myself in alcohol everyday after work. I was introduced to every kind of drug, but when I turn 26,
my brother told me to try heroin. immediately I thought, at least I won't have these hangover's anymore from
alcohol. but then I endured the worst addiction I've ever experienced. for three years it took to get off it.
in 2005 I was homeless on the streets of Santa Monica California, sleeping at the courthouse hoping to see a
judge about a ticket. 3 days without sleep I started crying, I found myself crying out to the Lord Jesus.
then I found a magazine from the Salvation Army, and I opened it and it had a picture of Jesus talking with a
child. this picture touched me, and all of a sudden I found myself walking to Venice California,someone along the
way referred me to the Bible Tabernacle Church near Venice beach. I met a man named Rico there, he told
me to come back in an hour and you can have dinner and spend the night at the men's house. so the next morning, I
met with another person. and he evaluated my skills, and told me I can join the ministry program. the next
morning I was told to read the Bible, I had received the Holy Spirit that morning,and a week later I got baptized
at the church. from then on I always depend on my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. never drugs or alcohol.
Fortunately, some new influences came into my life and slowly, question by question I had began being answered. I began filling the holes in my faith and I began feeling more hopeful about life. I'm grateful for everyone who followed God's nudging to come walk with me and offer support, even if for a short time. I believe God can use people to be blessings in other people's lives. And I was a recipient of that. I seek to pay it forward. I'm imperfect and still hit bumps in the road, but try my best to follow Jesus, love God and love my neighbor.
I also realized life isn't about me being happy. God doesn't exist for that. He's not a genie in a bottle there to serve me. I'm not entitled to anything, despite what this culture brainwashes people into believing. However, when I shift my focus onto loving God and loving others and deciding to be content, I naturally become far happier and satisfied with my life. Interesting how that works.
I was doing great at the job but my wife just couldn't find her way in the work field and was slipping away from being a wife/friend/sister, in the lord due to her not being able to fit in somewhere doing some kind of work, although she didn't have to go to work since the lord had blessed me with a good annual income to provide for the both of us,but she needed something to keep her busy and just couldn't find anything. I started to notice changes with her and odd behavior's happening , so as time continued to pass I just kept praying the lord will help her and guide her, but she just couldn't pull it together . Her friends were not Christians and she was falling back into drugs and drinking. I didn't know how to handle it and the churches we were attaining didn't care enough to help.
It was on a Sunday early evening when I got the call from my mother in law saying to me that Debbie had died, this is when the real story of my life begins, since that day I began to fall myself back into old habits and began to pursue DEATH to be with my Debbie. I did what I could do , to get to the grave and so I make a long story short because there are so so many words to add to the story here and to explain all of my experiences, all I can say at this juncture is if my story can be worth telling on your web-site...