How can I better handle adversaries? My next door neibors have gone from bad to worse. They moved next door a year ago. They have about five cameras around their house, and some behaviors make us suspicious of nefarious activities perpetuated by the camera's uses. Though my daughter or I engage with them, due to their nature, they pursue our attention. We have several times in the last month redirected erroneously delivered packages to them. We saw from a photo left by a delivery person a package of ours, which they had kept. When I thought we were at a peaceful time with them, I was going to pick up a tin of cookies and a Christmas card to just extend an unconditional greeting of holiday cheer, when I noticed in their window a poster board sign for the delivery persons to make sure they do not erroneously deliver to our address (they stated the address) because "[they] will never get the packages back." This is quite disturbing in that it is the antithesis of what we have been doing, and what we would ever do, and it throws us into a different light with the delivery people, with whom my daughter has had delivery from for five year .
They lead a different lifestyle than my daughter and I. I am consumed with my water community, serving on a board of
organization for waterproofing our youth,
and am consumed with data analytics and consulting work. My daughter is very busy with her own career where neither of us spend any time thinking about what others do, much less, trying to make other people's lives difficult. We need prayer for peace and contentment in our own lives as we continue to share it with like-minded friends and family, and community members. We're about sharing value and edifying others and need to remove ourselves from the neibors' devices.
Jackie, I am sorry you are having unpleasant interactions with your neighbors. I agree with Adam that you and your daughter should be praying for them often. And a card or welcoming gift may help (or not). It seems like they may just want to be left alone, for whatever reasons. I hope you can commit to being and continue being busy with your own business to keep your mind off your concerns. God is able to move whatever is in need of moving and bring resolve to your situation. Stay faithful to Him, focus on Him more than your neighbors.
I will pray for your situation.
Dear Lord Jesus, you know all things from start to finish. I ask that you will help Jackie's neighbors in whatever it is that they need most, especially if they need You, bring your grace and Word to them. Help Jackie and her daughter rest in peace knowing that You are their refuge and strong tower. Guide Jackie in how to reach out to these neighbors. I ask that if they are involved in criminal activity, that it will be found out by law enforcement and settled properly according to the law and justice of the courts. Put a stop to any nefarious activities they may be do or unkind thoughts these neighbors may harbor towards Jackie, her daughter and any other neighbors. We are trusting You to be present in this situation 24/7 and you ill bring it to a good end. We ask You, Jesus, all of these things, because You are our Lord and God. Amen
Thank you Gigi - I especially appreciate your insight and discernment. I pray so much for this family, to all God to work on my heart to see them not as enemies but likewise sinners as all of us. I thought things became more peaceful. I used to ignore their carport, which is aligned with mine, but the other day, I swept their debris as well, just to do it. As mentioned, I was prepared to provide a tin box of Christmas cookies and a card, but was drawn to the sign in their window, which is written in bold letters. I'm so busy being involved with my work, business, and projects, as daughter is with hers. We realized the more we ignore them they seem to seek attention. The problem is they live in the same parcel so that even ignoring is not entirely being unaware. I've always preferred being nice would help, but a police officer observed I find it easier to talk to homeless members around the community than to the neibors next door. I understand and have observed the young man selling drugs and we often smell marijuana coming from the house. So they're not quite the kind of people we associate with, though there is greater desire to be in better if neutral terms. Association is not safe - or desired, but prayer is always on and for them.
My daughter has lived in her house here for five years. The neibors moved in last year. In the first month, he was arrested and sat in a police car in front of our house being vocally expletive, etc. That was the beginning of nightmarish behaviors we are all enduring in this block. My daughter and I are not the only neibors who have been affected by their presence. They changed the environment where the rest of us live.
Again, thank you for your prayer - I feel it speaks accurately to the situation and need in this case. Good was surely speaking to you through it.
I noticed your prayer request and your question like you were looking for input from others. Assuming you are I'm happy to offer a few observations based on what you shared. I have had challenges with my own neighbors and it is really challenging to love thy neighbor and pray for them when they may seem so opposing.
Sometimes the most helpful response is not the one someone wants or expects. A few things you said makes me believe you are equally responsible for the problems with your neighbor and I will be happy to share that, assuming you want to hear it.
First, are you loving your neighbor and praying for them? You have asked for prayer and I have prayed for your situation, but have you genuinely prayed for your neighbor and how to be more loving as the Bible teaches? Have you prayed for their salvation? James 4:12, Luke 6:32, Matthew 5:44, Mark 12:31.
Next, there is nothing wrong with security cameras. They are an important deterrant to criminals.
You said you were able to see in their window and read a poster. Were you snooping and peeking through your neighbors windows at their private things? If so, that seems very wrong.
I believe you called your neighbors adversaries, but they're not supposed to be enemies. The Bible says satan is your real adversary: 1 Peter 5:8.
You said they kept a package, but did you ask for it back? Maybe they were out of town. Did the company reimburse or mail another? This seems pretty easy to resolve and is a common problem.
You said they are suspicious, but maybe they think you are suspicious? If I caught someone looking in my windows that definitely be hard to get over.
To rekindle the relationship perhaps show love and lead by example- the card idea is great.
This likely wasn't what you wanted to hear, but maybe it is the helpful. God bless...
Hi Adam - thank you for your response. It's hard to see both sides w/out experiencing the context, especially over time. The young lady & I used to speak. I'm sorry we have lost that with each other - however I have to share that I'm twice her age. She's close to my daughters ages so the disputes are basically of her age standings.To answer your questions:
1) I pray for them often. They have three young kids (2 are special needs and the youngest doesn't seem so).As a former teacher, I understand parents w/special needs children need patience from others. When they first moved in I offered multiple times to watch the children if she needed a break. She wouldn't utter anything in response. I continue to pray for her as I had often seen her as an overwhelmed parent.
2) She suddenly became weird. I used to chat with the young man of the cuff. One day my daughter drove home and the young man and I walked over to my daughter's car, where he was looking at a bumper. The young woman burst out the door, shielded the young man, and screamed at me and my daughter that "neither of us could have him." It was a strange occurrence, and that is where we felt it would be best to no longer engage. It implied a multitude of things we saw as justifiably negative and in a dark direction.
3) one random day, the guy stalked me in his car, dark windows, aggressive, and swift. It scared me. I had no idea from where that came.
4) I was not snooping in the window. It is a 30x50 case window (been an architect for 35 years.) The poster board is at least 30 length/letters bold black - enough pre-attentive attributes to effectively draw the eyes - doesn't require snooping - it draws attention.
5) I didn't grow up w/neibor conflicts, nor my daughters: as that will always be my standard. I'll continue to ensure they receive their packages, there's no behavior need or desire to act against them, or reason to think it safe to engage.
Hi Jackie, let's pray! I believe Jesus can step into this situation.
Precious Heavenly Father, I believe that Jackie wants peace with her neighbor. Seems like somehow the enemy got in there and is creating discord. So right now Lord, I ask you to bind up the enemy and bring peace to the hearts of Jackie and the neighbors that only comes from You hallelujah thank you Jesus. Put such a love in their heart that they would know that it must be you. Give Jackie a humility and a humble spirit help her to pray for their salvation and yes even their blessings! Make an opportunity Lord for Jackie to show Grace to her neighbors in love again and soften their hearts Lord. I know you can work this situation out. Jackie desires to live in peace with her neighbors, as do all of us. please make a way in Jesus name amen
God bless and keep you and yours Jackie! Just be sensitive to the moving of the Lord. And be sure to do whatever He asks of you even if it seems weird. Step out in faith. I know God can work this out. I believe He will either work it out, move your neighbors, change something about your character, or all of the above! Love your neighbor. Love them every time the opportunity presents itself.
Absolutely David! Those are wise words. I need to stay focused on God's presence in this situation, but also where He wants me to be in measured space - not just for me and my family, but for the neibor and their space needed for God to abound with His works and peace. Thank you for the firm and wise reminder!
They lead a different lifestyle than my daughter and I. I am consumed with my water community, serving on a board of
organization for waterproofing our youth,
and am consumed with data analytics and consulting work. My daughter is very busy with her own career where neither of us spend any time thinking about what others do, much less, trying to make other people's lives difficult. We need prayer for peace and contentment in our own lives as we continue to share it with like-minded friends and family, and community members. We're about sharing value and edifying others and need to remove ourselves from the neibors' devices.
I will pray for your situation.
Dear Lord Jesus, you know all things from start to finish. I ask that you will help Jackie's neighbors in whatever it is that they need most, especially if they need You, bring your grace and Word to them. Help Jackie and her daughter rest in peace knowing that You are their refuge and strong tower. Guide Jackie in how to reach out to these neighbors. I ask that if they are involved in criminal activity, that it will be found out by law enforcement and settled properly according to the law and justice of the courts. Put a stop to any nefarious activities they may be do or unkind thoughts these neighbors may harbor towards Jackie, her daughter and any other neighbors. We are trusting You to be present in this situation 24/7 and you ill bring it to a good end. We ask You, Jesus, all of these things, because You are our Lord and God. Amen
My daughter has lived in her house here for five years. The neibors moved in last year. In the first month, he was arrested and sat in a police car in front of our house being vocally expletive, etc. That was the beginning of nightmarish behaviors we are all enduring in this block. My daughter and I are not the only neibors who have been affected by their presence. They changed the environment where the rest of us live.
Again, thank you for your prayer - I feel it speaks accurately to the situation and need in this case. Good was surely speaking to you through it.
Thank you, Gigi
I noticed your prayer request and your question like you were looking for input from others. Assuming you are I'm happy to offer a few observations based on what you shared. I have had challenges with my own neighbors and it is really challenging to love thy neighbor and pray for them when they may seem so opposing.
Sometimes the most helpful response is not the one someone wants or expects. A few things you said makes me believe you are equally responsible for the problems with your neighbor and I will be happy to share that, assuming you want to hear it.
First, are you loving your neighbor and praying for them? You have asked for prayer and I have prayed for your situation, but have you genuinely prayed for your neighbor and how to be more loving as the Bible teaches? Have you prayed for their salvation? James 4:12, Luke 6:32, Matthew 5:44, Mark 12:31.
Next, there is nothing wrong with security cameras. They are an important deterrant to criminals.
You said you were able to see in their window and read a poster. Were you snooping and peeking through your neighbors windows at their private things? If so, that seems very wrong.
I believe you called your neighbors adversaries, but they're not supposed to be enemies. The Bible says satan is your real adversary: 1 Peter 5:8.
You said they kept a package, but did you ask for it back? Maybe they were out of town. Did the company reimburse or mail another? This seems pretty easy to resolve and is a common problem.
You said they are suspicious, but maybe they think you are suspicious? If I caught someone looking in my windows that definitely be hard to get over.
To rekindle the relationship perhaps show love and lead by example- the card idea is great.
This likely wasn't what you wanted to hear, but maybe it is the helpful. God bless...
1) I pray for them often. They have three young kids (2 are special needs and the youngest doesn't seem so).As a former teacher, I understand parents w/special needs children need patience from others. When they first moved in I offered multiple times to watch the children if she needed a break. She wouldn't utter anything in response. I continue to pray for her as I had often seen her as an overwhelmed parent.
2) She suddenly became weird. I used to chat with the young man of the cuff. One day my daughter drove home and the young man and I walked over to my daughter's car, where he was looking at a bumper. The young woman burst out the door, shielded the young man, and screamed at me and my daughter that "neither of us could have him." It was a strange occurrence, and that is where we felt it would be best to no longer engage. It implied a multitude of things we saw as justifiably negative and in a dark direction.
3) one random day, the guy stalked me in his car, dark windows, aggressive, and swift. It scared me. I had no idea from where that came.
4) I was not snooping in the window. It is a 30x50 case window (been an architect for 35 years.) The poster board is at least 30 length/letters bold black - enough pre-attentive attributes to effectively draw the eyes - doesn't require snooping - it draws attention.
5) I didn't grow up w/neibor conflicts, nor my daughters: as that will always be my standard. I'll continue to ensure they receive their packages, there's no behavior need or desire to act against them, or reason to think it safe to engage.
Precious Heavenly Father, I believe that Jackie wants peace with her neighbor. Seems like somehow the enemy got in there and is creating discord. So right now Lord, I ask you to bind up the enemy and bring peace to the hearts of Jackie and the neighbors that only comes from You hallelujah thank you Jesus. Put such a love in their heart that they would know that it must be you. Give Jackie a humility and a humble spirit help her to pray for their salvation and yes even their blessings! Make an opportunity Lord for Jackie to show Grace to her neighbors in love again and soften their hearts Lord. I know you can work this situation out. Jackie desires to live in peace with her neighbors, as do all of us. please make a way in Jesus name amen
God bless and keep you and yours Jackie! Just be sensitive to the moving of the Lord. And be sure to do whatever He asks of you even if it seems weird. Step out in faith. I know God can work this out. I believe He will either work it out, move your neighbors, change something about your character, or all of the above! Love your neighbor. Love them every time the opportunity presents itself.
said I believe they live in great fear not knowingly so scripturally walk in love and pray for them. Other
than that help when they allow but don't get caught up in their situation. Give it to God for a door to open
but don't pry it.
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