This book of the bible scares me so much, I have read the New Testament many times over and i cannot find any example of a Christian leaving or turning away and being able to come back to Christ i can't find peace or forgiveness anywhere. The minute i wake up in the morning my mind starts telling i have no forgiveness it seems like every sin i have ever committed runs through my head laughing at me. I have repented and turned away from that like but it seems like it has been to long and there is a wall i can't get through, i know about the prodigal son but that was a parable. It seems like i am living for Christ as an example to others but inside i feel like hell is my final destination, living like this is torture the most unhappy person in the world is a person who can't find Jesus anymore and knows the truth, it says in James the prayer of a righteous man avails much, please whoever reads this and you are a Christian pray for me. Hebrews chap 6:4-6 and chap 12; 16-17 read to me and others because i have read lots about this, that we have no hope
You quoted Heb chaps 6 & 12, so to clarify only these portions to you. Heb 6:4-6 speaks of those who turn their backs to God having appeared to be Christians in their midst. They showed all the signs of spirituality, joined in fellowship, received the Word, but ultimately refused God & turned their backs to Him. To these, the Writer says, that Christ can't be crucified a second time (i.e. Christ's death can't be made a mockery every time one chooses to repent for salvation) & they will find no place for repentance. BUT the writer goes on to say in verse 9: "BUT beloved, we are persuaded better things of you", inferring that those who were genuine believers in that Fellowship, wouldn't go the way of those who turn their backs to God & whose (genuine) salvation was clear & secure. So, are you in this position? From reading your comment, I see you yearning for assurance of your salvation, not as these folk in vv 4-6 who were willing to give God away for their own ends.
Heb 12:16,17: this speaks of Esau's rejection & cannot apply to you or me, as any sincere repentance for his foolish act was useless because he could never retrieve the blessing already given to Jacob by Isaac. It was a physical matter that changed the course of history. We have all foolishly refused Christ at some point, but unlike Esau's situation of rejection, we have a longing, waiting God Who wants to secure our cleansing, our new relationship with the Godhead & give us a hope & a future that can never be taken away: Jn 6:37 "All that the Father giveth me SHALL come to me; and him that cometh to me I WILL IN NO WISE cast out".
So, it is so important for you to be assured & confident in the gift of salvation given in spite of how you may feel. To continue to assure our hearts & to oppose what Satan wants to do & take away our joy, we must continue to study the Word, rightly dividing it, & focussing on the specific words that give us the assurance of His Love & our faith."( Heb 3:14).
Secondly, in understanding the Scriptures. You said: "The minute I wake up in the morning my mind starts telling I have no forgiveness it seems like every sin I have ever committed runs through my head laughing at me." If a person hasn't left his sins that he has repented of at the foot of the Cross for Jesus to deal with, then either he has not truly repented or he is listening to Satan who wants to afflict him with past sins to make them the present burdens. Doesn't Jesus say to come to Him with our heavy loads & He WILL give you rest? ( Mt 11:28-30). Of course, Jesus was primarily referring to the heavy loads imposed by the Jewish leaders, but it surely applies to the loads & cares we carry now that we can confidently put on Him & leave it there. Look at the many Scriptures that affirm that God will DO something: even Jn 3:16, 'if we believe on Him we SHALL NOT perish but HAVE eternal life'. Are you abiding in Christ? You say you are ("I'm living for Christ but you don't feel like that inside") but re-read 2 Tim 2:11-13 & take note of the affirmations: "we SHALL also live; we SHALL also reign; Jesus REMAINS faithful". There are so, so many Scriptures that give us complete confidence in Jesus' Work for us, His accepting us on the basis of our faith & will never deny or reject us. So, our joy is in what Christ has done for us & not how our feelings may sway us from time to time. (onto Page 3.)
Lost 1, you've painted a very sad picture of yourself & your struggles, & there are many who also entertain such thoughts & hold such feelings. I see two things here: you are allowing your feelings to control the facts of God's Salvation for you and you have to also correctly understand the Scriptures. We often fail in appreciating & applying biblical Truths to our lives because of these two hindrances. I should state also, that I know a dear sister in the Lord, who has over many years, been plagued with thoughts of having committed the unpardonable sin: that she has inadvertently blasphemed against the Holy Spirit & there was no forgiveness for her. No amount of counsel & Scriptural help given to her from me & others would allay her fears & she remained totally overcome. Her Christian doctor, from tests, found that there was also a chemical imbalance in her brain which didn't help her deal with worry & fear & so prescribed relevant medication, to which she is on till now. I'm not suggesting this of you or even that she should pull out of her agony only by the Lord's intervention, but I do know that she is quite free now because of medication
Having said that, I would like to strongly suggest that even though God has given us the ability to sense joy in our salvation, the Spirit's Work in our lives, & the consequence of Calvary's Work, we still have to rely on the fact of our salvation, even when our feelings about it or ourselves appear to contradict. An example would be like a child who may sometimes feel that he is not part of a family because of unfairness or discipline, but the fact remains, he is very much a part of his family aside from perceived feelings about it. So don't let your feelings control the facts from Scripture or what has taken place in your life - feelings are unreliable - God's Word is totally reliable. (onto Page 2.)
You quoted Heb chaps 6 & 12, so to clarify only these portions to you. Heb 6:4-6 speaks of those who turn their backs to God having appeared to be Christians in their midst. They showed all the signs of spirituality, joined in fellowship, received the Word, but ultimately refused God & turned their backs to Him. To these, the Writer says, that Christ can't be crucified a second time (i.e. Christ's death can't be made a mockery every time one chooses to repent for salvation) & they will find no place for repentance. BUT the writer goes on to say in verse 9: "BUT beloved, we are persuaded better things of you", inferring that those who were genuine believers in that Fellowship, wouldn't go the way of those who turn their backs to God & whose (genuine) salvation was clear & secure. So, are you in this position? From reading your comment, I see you yearning for assurance of your salvation, not as these folk in vv 4-6 who were willing to give God away for their own ends.
Heb 12:16,17: this speaks of Esau's rejection & cannot apply to you or me, as any sincere repentance for his foolish act was useless because he could never retrieve the blessing already given to Jacob by Isaac. It was a physical matter that changed the course of history. We have all foolishly refused Christ at some point, but unlike Esau's situation of rejection, we have a longing, waiting God Who wants to secure our cleansing, our new relationship with the Godhead & give us a hope & a future that can never be taken away: Jn 6:37 "All that the Father giveth me SHALL come to me; and him that cometh to me I WILL IN NO WISE cast out".
So, it is so important for you to be assured & confident in the gift of salvation given in spite of how you may feel. To continue to assure our hearts & to oppose what Satan wants to do & take away our joy, we must continue to study the Word, rightly dividing it, & focussing on the specific words that give us the assurance of His Love & our faith."( Heb 3:14).
Secondly, in understanding the Scriptures. You said: "The minute I wake up in the morning my mind starts telling I have no forgiveness it seems like every sin I have ever committed runs through my head laughing at me." If a person hasn't left his sins that he has repented of at the foot of the Cross for Jesus to deal with, then either he has not truly repented or he is listening to Satan who wants to afflict him with past sins to make them the present burdens. Doesn't Jesus say to come to Him with our heavy loads & He WILL give you rest? ( Mt 11:28-30). Of course, Jesus was primarily referring to the heavy loads imposed by the Jewish leaders, but it surely applies to the loads & cares we carry now that we can confidently put on Him & leave it there. Look at the many Scriptures that affirm that God will DO something: even Jn 3:16, 'if we believe on Him we SHALL NOT perish but HAVE eternal life'. Are you abiding in Christ? You say you are ("I'm living for Christ but you don't feel like that inside") but re-read 2 Tim 2:11-13 & take note of the affirmations: "we SHALL also live; we SHALL also reign; Jesus REMAINS faithful". There are so, so many Scriptures that give us complete confidence in Jesus' Work for us, His accepting us on the basis of our faith & will never deny or reject us. So, our joy is in what Christ has done for us & not how our feelings may sway us from time to time. (onto Page 3.)
Lost 1, you've painted a very sad picture of yourself & your struggles, & there are many who also entertain such thoughts & hold such feelings. I see two things here: you are allowing your feelings to control the facts of God's Salvation for you and you have to also correctly understand the Scriptures. We often fail in appreciating & applying biblical Truths to our lives because of these two hindrances. I should state also, that I know a dear sister in the Lord, who has over many years, been plagued with thoughts of having committed the unpardonable sin: that she has inadvertently blasphemed against the Holy Spirit & there was no forgiveness for her. No amount of counsel & Scriptural help given to her from me & others would allay her fears & she remained totally overcome. Her Christian doctor, from tests, found that there was also a chemical imbalance in her brain which didn't help her deal with worry & fear & so prescribed relevant medication, to which she is on till now. I'm not suggesting this of you or even that she should pull out of her agony only by the Lord's intervention, but I do know that she is quite free now because of medication
Having said that, I would like to strongly suggest that even though God has given us the ability to sense joy in our salvation, the Spirit's Work in our lives, & the consequence of Calvary's Work, we still have to rely on the fact of our salvation, even when our feelings about it or ourselves appear to contradict. An example would be like a child who may sometimes feel that he is not part of a family because of unfairness or discipline, but the fact remains, he is very much a part of his family aside from perceived feelings about it. So don't let your feelings control the facts from Scripture or what has taken place in your life - feelings are unreliable - God's Word is totally reliable. (onto Page 2.)
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